Pacing, from the outside for a change


Now that I’m writing more, I find (again) that I don’t always know if I’m writing a blog post or journal entry until after the fact. (When I’m in practice, I always know ahead of time.) Naturally, the blog posts go here, and the journal entries don’t, so this is only visible at my end. However, I’m getting more journaling done, and that’s definitely good for my brain!

My partner J is learning to pace himself. He’s bit older than I am, is a bit hyperactive, and has had outrageously good health all his life. The onset of, um, late middle age is coming as a rather shocking surprise to someone whose body seemed to hold its position from 25 to 55 … and then it only took a decade or so for him to have some peace and wisdom around the fact that it’s time to act with more peace and wisdom.

Of course, in his case, he first had to find a place where acting with peace and wisdom was a survival path, rather than an invitation to younger predators.

Etching of elephant in distance, man taking aim at elephant with rifle, another man preparing to stab the man with rifle.
Life in J’s old neighborhood. Img from Wikimedia Commons.

I used to think that it didn’t much matter where I lived, that people were people and that things would work out much the same nonetheless. Boy, have I ever changed my mind about that. Some places are nice to visit, but I wouldn’t want to live there.

Back here in the North Beast, the cold snap has us both moving slowly. We’re about 2/3 done with sanding the driveway, and will take a couple days to rest until the next push on that task. It’s good to sit here in the living room all cozy and peaceful, because he’s now comfortable with doing things in episodes.

Pacing is a tough thing to learn, but it’s nice once you get it. It’s easier on those around you, too. Who knew? I never thought of that before, until I was one of those hanging around a person who paced himself successfully.

Line drawing of woman flat on floor, with woozles coming out of her head
Image mine. Creative Commons share-alike attribution license 🙂

We are warm, safe, housed, fed, loved, and cherished. For all the years that none of that was true for either of us, well, we never knew this was up ahead. We had to stay alive long enough to get to this point. It wasn’t easy. I’m glad we did.

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